This is a chapter from J.C. Ryle's classic book Practical Religion.
THE BEST FRIEND
"This is my friend." Song of Solomon 5:16
A friend is one of the greatest blessings on earth. Affection is better than money and sympathy is better than lands. He who has no friends is a poor man. The world is full of sorrow because it is full of sin. Therefore it is often a dark, lonely, and disappointing place, but the brightest sunbeam in it is a friend. Friendship halves our troubles and doubles our joys.
A real friend, however, is rare. Many will eat, drink, and laugh with us in days of prosperity, but few will stand by us in days of darkness: when we are sick, helpless, or poor. Fewest of all will care for our souls. Do you want a real friend? I know of One "who sticks closer than a brother" (Proverbs 18:24). He is ready to be your friend for all time and eternity if you will receive Him. Happy is the person whose chief friend is the Lord Jesus Christ!
1. The Lord Jesus is a friend in need. Man is the neediest creature on earth because he is a sinner. There is no need so great as that of sinners: poverty, hunger, thirst, cold, sickness are all nothing in comparison. Sinners need pardon, but they are utterly unable to provide it for themselves. They need deliverance from a guilty conscience and the fear of death, but have no power of their own to obtain that. This need the Lord Jesus came into the world to relieve. We are told specifically, "Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners" (1 Timothy 1:15).
We are all by nature poor dying creatures, all sick of a mortal disease of soul. Whether we know and feel it or not, we are all dying daily. The plague of sin is in our blood. We cannot cure it ourselves and we are hourly getting worse. But the Lord Jesus came to bring "health and healing" (Jeremiah 33:6), deliver us "from the second death" (Revelation 2:11), abolish death, and bring "life and immortality to light through the Gospel" (2 Timothy 1:10).
We are all by nature deep in debt to God, bankrupt without any ability to free ourselves from our daily-increasing load of liabilities. All that the Lord Jesus perceived and undertook to remedy. He came "to proclaim liberty to the captives and the opening of the prison to those who are bound" (Isaiah 61:1). He "redeemed us from the curse of the Law, having become a curse for us" (Galatians 3:13). Jesus canceled "the record of debt that stood against us with its legal demands. This He set aside, nailing it to the cross" (Colossians 2:14).
We were all by nature shipwrecked and cast away. We never could have reached the harbor of everlasting life. We were sinking in the midst of the waves, foundering under the chain of our sins and the burden of guilt. But the Lord Jesus came down from heaven to be our "helper" (Psalm 118:6; Hebrews 13:5-6). He came "to seek and to save that which was lost" (Luke 19:10), and deliver us "from going down to the Pit" (Job 33:24).
Could we have been rescued without the Lord Jesus Christ coming down from heaven? Without the friendship of Christ, we should all have been lost forever in hell. Was He obliged to come down to save us? No, it is in His divine nature to be full of love, mercy, and pity. He came unsought and unasked for because He is gracious. There never was such a friend in need as the Lord Jesus.
2. The Lord Jesus is a friend in deed. The true extent of a man's friendship must be measured by his deeds. Friendly is who friendly does—not feels, says, or wishes. Never were there acts of kindness and self-denial on behalf of humanity like those of our Lord Jesus Christ. For our sakes He who is very God and equal with the Father and the Holy Spirit condescended to take our human nature upon Himself by being born of a woman as a humble baby and experiencing our bodily weaknesses and infirmities, except sin (Hebrews 4:14-15). "Our Lord Jesus Christ, though He was rich," yet for our sakes He became poor, that we "through His poverty might become rich" (2 Corinthians 8:9).
For us He lived about 33 years in this evil world. Although He is the King of kings, He often had no place to lay His head; although He is Lord of lords, He was frequently weary, hungry, thirsty, and poor. He took "the form of a servant" and "humbled Himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross" (Philippians 2:7-8). Although innocent and without fault, He allowed Himself to be condemned and found guilty. He who is the Prince of Life was led as a lamb to the slaughter. Truly He "died for us" (1 Thessalonians 5:10).
Was our Lord Jesus Christ obliged to do that? No, He might have summoned to His help more than 12 legions of angels or scattered His enemies with a mere word. He suffered voluntarily, of His own free will, to make atonement for His people's sins. He knew that nothing but the sacrifice of His body and blood as the God-Man could ever make peace between sinful man and holy God (1 Timothy 2:5; Isaiah 53). He laid down His life to pay the price of our redemption. Christ "suffered once for sins, the just for the unjust, that He might bring us to God" (1 Peter 3:18). He "who knew no sin" was on the cross made "sin for us that we might become the righteousness of God in Him" (2 Corinthians 5:21).
Such friendship as this passes our full understanding. Friends who would die for those who love them we hear of sometimes. But who can find a man who would lay down his life for those who hate him? Yet that is what Jesus has done for us. "God demonstrates His own love toward us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.... If when we were enemies we were reconciled to God through the death of His Son, how much more, having been reconciled, we shall be saved by His life!" (Romans 5:6-10). Inquire from one end of the earth to the other and you will nowhere hear of a deed like that. No one was ever so high and stooped so low as God the Son; none ever gave so costly a proof of His friendship and endured so much to do good to others. Never was there a friend in deed like our Lord Jesus Christ.
3. The Lord Jesus is a mighty and powerful friend. Many desire to do good to others, but lack the power to help where most needed. They feel for the sorrows of others and would gladly relieve them if they could; they can weep with their friends in affliction, but are unable to take their grief away. Although the best of our earthly friends are limited, Christ is almighty. He declared shortly before His ascension to heaven, "All authority has been given to Me in heaven and on earth" (Matthew 28:18). No one can do so much for those He befriends than Jesus.
A. He is able to pardon and save the worst sinners. Listen to the testimony of the apostle Paul: "I was formerly a blasphemer, a persecutor, and an insolent man; but I obtained mercy.... This is a faithful saying and worthy of all acceptance, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, of whom I am chief. But I received mercy for this reason, that in me ... Christ might display His perfect patience as an example to those who are to believe in Him for eternal life." (1 Timothy 1:13-16; Acts 9). The Lord Jesus can deliver the most guilty conscience from all its burdens and give it peace with God. Obedient faith in Jesus, who shed His blood for His people, "cleanses us from all sins" (1 John 1:7).
B. He is able to convert the hardest of hearts and create in man a new spirit. Our Lord Jesus Christ can take the most thoughtless and ungodly people, and give them another mind by the Holy Spirit He puts in them. He can cause old things to pass away and all things to become new. He can help His people love good things they once hated and hate evil things they once loved. To as many as receive Him for who He really is, Savior and Lord, He gives "the right to become children of God, to those who believe in His name" (John 1:12). "If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation" (2 Corinthians 5:17).
C. He is able to preserve to the end all who believe in Him and become His disciples. The Lord Jesus can give them grace to overcome the world, the flesh, and the devil so they fight the good fight to the end. He can lead them safely through every temptation, carry them home through a thousand dangers, and keep them faithful, even when they stand alone with none to help them. He is "able to save to the uttermost those who come to God through Him" (Hebrews 7:25).
D. He is able to give those who love Him the best of gifts. In this life Jesus can give them inward comforts money can never buy, such as peace in poverty, joy in sorrow, and patience in suffering. As they approach death He can give them bright hopes that enable them to walk through that dark valley without fear. After death He can give them a "crown of glory that does not fade away" (1 Peter 5:4) and other rewards no earthly ruler can come near to bestowing.
In the Lord Jesus Christ is power indeed, true greatness and real strength. Think with compassion, for example, on the Hindu seeking peace by afflicting his body, but after decades of self-imposed suffering unable to find it; on the Roman Catholic giving money for priests to pray for her soul, yet dying without comfort; on the worldly rich man spending thousands or millions in search of happiness, but remaining discontent and unhappy. Then turn to Jesus and think what He can do, and is daily doing, for all who trust Him. Think how He heals the broken-hearted, comforts the sick, and cheers all the poor who trust in Him, supplying their daily needs. The fear of man is strong, the opposition of this evil world is mighty, the lusts of the flesh rage horribly, the reality of death is dreadful, and the devil is a roaring lion that seeks to devour, but Jesus is stronger than them all. He can make us "more than conquerors" over all those foes (Romans 8:37). There never was so mighty a friend as Jesus the Christ.
4. The Lord Jesus is a loving and affectionate friend. Kindness is the very essence of true friendship. Money, advice, and help lose half their grace if not given in a loving manner. How is the love of Jesus for mankind described? As that "which passes knowledge" (Ephesians 3:19). It shines forth in His reception of all kinds of sinners. He refuses none who come to Him in sincerity for salvation, however wicked they may be. He is not ashamed to befriend those whom the world casts off as hopeless. He has kindness, mercy, and healing medicine for all. The Lord Jesus has long proclaimed this to be His rule: "the one who comes to Me I will by no means cast out" (John 6:37).
His love also shines forth in His dealings with sinners after they have believed in Him and become His friends. He is very patient with them, even though their conduct is often very trying and provoking. He never tires of hearing their complaints, however often they come to Him. He sympathizes deeply in all their sorrows. He know what pain is: He is "acquainted with grief" (Isaiah 53:3). In all their afflictions He Himself is afflicted. He never allows them to be tempted beyond what they are able to bear. He supplies them with daily grace for their daily needs. Their poor services are acceptable to Him: He is as well pleased with them as a parent with his or her own little child's attempts to speak and walk. It is written in His Book that "the Lord takes pleasure in His people ... in those who fear Him" (Psalm 149:4; 147:11).
No love on earth compares to this. We love those in whom we see something that deserves our affection; the Lord Jesus loves sinners in whom there is no good thing. We love those from whom we get some return for our affection; the Lord loves those who can do little or nothing for Him compared to what He does for them. We love where we can give some reason for loving; the great Friend of sinners draws His reasons out of His everlasting compassion. His love is purely disinterested, purely unselfish, purely free. Never was there so loving a friend as the Lord Jesus.
5. The Lord Jesus is a wise and prudent friend. Sometimes we lead our friends astray in the unwise counsel we give, even though we mean to help them. Sometimes we entangle them in the vanities of the world when they otherwise would have escaped. Friendship with the Lord Jesus Christ is never like that. It always does us good and never evil.
He never spoils His friends by injudicious indulgence. He gives them everything that is truly for their benefit, but He requires them take up their cross daily and follow Him. He calls them to endure hardships as good soldiers, calling on them to fight the good fight against the world, the flesh, and the devil.
The Lord Jesus makes no mistakes in caring for His friends. He orders all their concerns with perfect wisdom: all things happen to them at the right time and in the right way. He gives His friends as much sickness and health, poverty and riches, sorrow and joy as their souls require. Like the Great Physician He is, He takes care that the dosage He prescribes is not a drop too strong or weak. Sometimes His people misunderstand His dealings, but in the resurrection day they will thank God that not their will, but Christ's, was done.
Notice how friends are much more ready to encourage one another in worldliness and levity than in love and good deeds. Turn now to the great Friend of sinners and listen to Him as He walks with His disciples. You hear Him comfort, reprove, and exhort them with perfect wisdom. He times His visits to His friends, such as Mary, Martha, and Lazarus, with great precision for their benefit (Luke 10:38-42; John 11). His company is always sanctifying, His gifts are always for our soul's good, His kindness is always wise, His fellowship is always edifying. Never was there such a wise friend as Jesus Christ.
6. The Lord Jesus is a tried and proved friend. Over hundreds of years, many have refused His friendship and been lost, but thousands multiplied have enjoyed the mighty privilege of His friendship and been saved.
A. He has friends of every rank and station in life. Some of them were kings and rich men, like David, Solomon, Hezekiah, and Job. Some were poor, such as the shepherds of Bethlehem and the Galilean fishermen Peter, Andrew, James, and John, but they were all alike Christ's friends.
B. He has friends of every age. Some of them did not have the privilege of knowing Him until they were advanced in years, like Manasseh, Nicodemus, and perhaps Zacchaeus and the Ethiopian eunuch. Some were friends of the pre-incarnate Christ from early childhood, like Joseph, Samuel, and Josiah. Young adult Timothy became a friend of Christ after His ascension.
C. He has friends of every possible temperament and disposition. Some are plain men, like Isaac; some are mighty in word and deed, like Moses; some are fervent and warm-hearted, like Peter; some are stormy yet loving, like John; some are busy and service-oriented, like Martha; some love to sit quietly and learn, like Mary; some live unknown among their own people, like the Shulamite bride; some go everywhere and turn the world upside down, like Paul. They were all alike Christ's friends.
D. He has friends of every condition in life. Some are married and have sons and daughters, like Enoch; some live and die unmarried, like John the Baptist, Jeremiah, and perhaps Daniel; some are sick, like Lazarus and Ephaphroditus; some are strong workers, like Persis, Tryphena, and Tryphosa; some are masters, like Abraham and Cornelius; some are servants, like the saints in Nero's household; some of them had bad servants, like Elisha; some of them had bad masters, like King Ahab's servant Obadiah; some of them had bad wives and children, like King David. But they were all alike Christ's friends.
E. He has friends of every nation, people, and tongue. Christ's Gospel has spread to every portion of the globe through the centuries, and continues to be translated into the languages of all the world's people. Shortly before our Lord returns, we are told of this magnificent sight: "a great multitude which no one could number, of all nations, tribes, peoples, and tongues, standing before the throne and before the Lamb [Jesus], clothed with white robes, with palm branches in their hands, and crying out with a loud voice, saying, 'Salvation belongs to our God who sits on the throne, and to the Lamb!'" (Revelation 7:9-10). All of these—past, present, and future—have tried Christ's friendship and proved it to be good. They all found nothing lacking when they began and nothing wanting as they went on. No lack, no defect, no deficiency was ever found, or will be found by any of them in the Lord Jesus Christ. Never was there a friend so fully tried and proved as Him.
7. The Lord Jesus is an unfailing friend. The saddest part of all good things on earth is their impermanence. Riches make themselves wings and fly away, youth and beauty are for only a few years, strength of body eventually decays, mind and intellect fade. All is passing away, but one splendid exception to this general rule is friendship with Christ.
A. He never changes. There is no fickleness about Him. Whom He loves, He loves to the end. Husbands have been known to forsake their wives, and parents have been known to cast off their children. Human vows and promises of faithfulness have often been forgotten. Many have been neglected in their poverty and old age who once were honored when they were young and rich. But Christ never changes in His commitment to His friends. He is "the same yesterday, today, and forever" (Hebrews 13:8).
B. He never goes away from His friends. There is never a parting between the Lord Jesus and His people. From the time He makes His abode in the sinner's heart, He abides in it forever. The world is full of farewells and departures. Grown children go forth to make their way in life and to marry. Death eventually breaks up even the most united family. How many we have tearfully watched as they drove away from our doors, whose pleasant faces we have never seen again? How many we have sorrowfully followed to the grave, and then come back to a cold, silent, and lonely home? But thanks be to God, there is One who never leaves His friends! Our Lord Jesus Christ has promised, "I will never leave you nor forsake you" (Hebrews 13:5).
C. He goes with His friends wherever they go. There is no possible separation between Jesus and those whom He loves. No place or position on earth or under the earth can divide them from the great Friend of their souls. When duty calls them far away from home, He is their companion. When they pass through the fire and water of fierce tribulation, He is with them. When they lie down on the bed of sickness, He stands by them and makes all their troubles work for their good. When they go down the valley of the shadow of death to the point where friends and relatives can go no further, He goes down by their side. When they wake up in what is to them the unknown world of Paradise, they are still with Him. When they receive a new body on resurrection day, they will not be alone. He will make good His own words: "I am with you always, even to the end of the age" (Matthew 28:20).
Think of the partings, separations, disappointments, and bereavements that are so much a part of life and consider what a privilege it is that there is One who never fails and in whom no one was ever disappointed. Never was there so unfailing a friend as our Lord Jesus Christ!
To conclude with words of plain application, let me first ask you solemnly whether Christ is your Friend and you are His. There are thousands, I am grieved to say, who have been baptized in His name and are outward members of His church, but are not Christ's friends. How can you tell? Do they hate the sins Jesus died to put away? No. Do they care for the souls of others, which are so precious in His sight? No. Do they delight in all parts of His Word? No. Do they speak with the Friend of sinners in prayer? No. Do they seek close fellowship with Him? No. How is it with you?
If Christ is not your friend, know that you are in the midst of a failing, sorrowful world without any lasting source of comfort or refuge for your greatest needs. You are a dying creature, but you are not ready to die. You have sins, but they are not forgiven. You are going to be judged, but you are not prepared to meet God. It does not matter what your income is: without Christ's friendship, you are very poor.
If you really want to, Christ is willing to become your friend. He has invited you and is ready to receive you, as unworthy as you may feel, and write you name down in the list of His friends. He is ready to pardon all the past, clothe you with righteousness, give you His Spirit, and make you His own dear child. All He asks you to do is come to Him. Come with all your sins, acknowledging their evil and confessing that you are ashamed. Wait for nothing: come and be wise, safe, and happy. Jesus bids you to come and be His friend.
If Christ already is your friend, know that you have great privileges and walk worthy of them. Seek every day to have closer communion with your Friend and know more of His grace and power. True Christianity is not only believing the wonderful truths God has revealed in His Word, but also daily personal communication with an actual living person, the Lord Jesus Christ, risen from the dead never to die again and ascended in glory, who will return in great power. He "who has friends must himself be friendly" (Proverbs 18:24), and surely no man or woman is under such obligation as the friend of Christ. Seek to honor and reflect Him in all you do, and avoid anything that would grieve Him. Tell others about Him faithfully, for He loves to make new friends and add to our fellowship. Think of Him often and thank Him often, no matter what. He is the Best Friend ever who has your very best interests at heart. One day your Friend will come to take you home to live with Him and all His friends forever. How rich and happy are all who have Christ as their friend!
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